Before we start, just sit here for a second.
Notice what your body feels like right now.
And think about what made you click on this post to begin with.
Because I think there’s probably a part of you that feels burned out.
And I want to introduce you to this concept that I’ve been sitting with called self-loyalty.
Because I think for a lot of us, we’re not just burned out because we have too much to do.
We’re burned out because we keep betraying ourselves.
And when I say betraying yourself, I mean all of those moments where you knew what you wanted, you knew what you needed, you knew something didn’t feel right for you, and you chose something else anyway.
And sometimes you had good reasons.
Sometimes you were thinking about your family.
Sometimes you were thinking about your relationship.
Sometimes you needed the money.
Sometimes you didn’t want to disappoint somebody.
Sometimes you genuinely did not know what the hell you wanted.
But when you do that over and over and over again, eventually you become disconnected from yourself.
So for me, self-loyalty is learning how to choose yourself again.
And I don’t mean choosing yourself in this selfish, fuck everybody else kind of way.
I mean being able to get connected enough with yourself that, in any given moment, you can ask:
What decision works best for me right now?
And that decision may not be easy.
That’s the thing.
The decision that’s best for you isn’t always the decision that feels the best.
Sometimes choosing yourself is uncomfortable.
Sometimes it disappoints people.
Sometimes it requires sacrifice.
Sometimes it means staying.
Sometimes it means leaving.
Sometimes it means doing the hard thing.
But I think what matters is being able to have peace with the decision you made because you know that when you made it, you made it from a sober place.
You weren’t making it because you were panicking.
You weren’t making it because somebody pressured you.
You weren’t making it because you were trying to prove something.
You got quiet enough to hear yourself.
And you chose what you genuinely believed was best for you at that time.
Because here’s the other part of self-loyalty:
You can choose again.
That’s it.
You can literally choose again.
You can make a decision today, and if six months from now that shit doesn’t work for you anymore, you get to make another decision.
And I think there is so much liberation in that.
Because I don’t have to know today what is going to work for me forever.
I just need to be connected enough to myself to know what works for me right now.
And then I need to trust myself enough to know that if it stops working, I’ll choose again.
And again.
And again.
That’s how you become loyal to yourself.
And every time you choose yourself, you learn a little bit more about yourself.
What feels good.
What doesn’t.
What costs you too much.
What you actually want.
What you thought you wanted.
What you can tolerate.
What you can’t.
What brings you peace.
And the more connected you become to yourself, the more your decisions actually start serving you.
That’s why I think this starts with the body.
Because before you can choose yourself, you have to be able to feel yourself.
You have to notice yourself.
You have to start paying attention to what happens inside of you before your brain comes in with 97 reasons why you should override it.
So that’s where I want you to start.
Not with some huge life decision.
Just notice yourself today.
Notice the little choices.
And when you have an opportunity to choose, ask yourself:
What works best for me right now?
Then make the best decision you can with the information, capacity, clarity, and version of yourself that you have today.
And give yourself permission to choose again tomorrow.
Because I really believe you have to fall in love with yourself enough to keep choosing you, every single day.
And all of those little choices?
Eventually they create the life you’ve been trying to manifest for years.